(originally written & published on January 18, 2013)
With all the driving back & forth from all of these get they usually get home at around 5pm. Then he maybe has 30-60 minutes to unwind, watch some tv, before it's 6pm and dinner time. I get home around 6:30pm-ish and they are usually just finishing up dinner. And lately by 8pm he's ready to go upstairs to bed. So that leaves 6:30pm-8pm as the time that I could be trying to "work" with him.
But I will readily admit that I'm tired from working all day. And he's tired from a full day at school. And so 6:30-8pm is more tv watching for the king.
The weekends, we have lots of outside activities that I write about often. Music therapy & swim on Saturday. And gymnastics & swim on Sunday. And we get home from those around 2pm. And yes, from 2pm on we have plenty of time to try to have structured play time with our kid. But we don't. We do laundry, have lunch, watch tv, etc. Sometimes we will have family over... but not much structure or learning going on.
But when I would try to work with him it was SO FREAKING HARD... and would make me angry & depressed & more guily.
I wrote this in a previous blog post
... if your kid shows a glimmer of interest in learning it makes it SO much easier to "work" with him on your own.When you get something back from your kid when you use a particular teaching method (ABA, Pecs, etc), even if it's just a glimmer of something, an iota of something it makes you want to work with him on your own outside of the "school day".We haven't seen that from Kyle in a LONG time. He doesn't enjoy learning anymore. With mom & dad he gets stressed when you ask him the simplest question like "point to nose"
And that still is true. So we've kinda given up. And we are all much happier for it.
Now that's not to say that we don't push him. We got him potty trained. We still try to push him to dress himself. And to use a fork properly. This stuff is a struggle too. But this is stuff we will push him more on.
I guess you could say we push him on "life skills" at home but we are thru pushing him on academic / educational stuff. If he doesn't know "point to the letter A" by now maybe he never will. And if he knows it, but his point is off, then we will try to work on his point (another life skill?).
But if he knew the letter A but his point was off wouldn't that frustrate the shit out of him? If he could read or type but couldn't because of some fine motor issue, wouldn't he melt down because of it? But he doesn't. So I don't think he is a Carly Fleischmann. He is not frustrated with what he can't do. He is just happy being who he is. And enjoying his toddler shows & toys.
When Kyle is in a good place behaviorally things can feel kinda normal in our house. Not like raising a typical 9 year old...but maybe like raising a typical 2 year old.
So for now we are going to continue doing what we are doing and not feeling guilty about it. Letting the school do their thing as best they can, sending him to lots of activities after school, and on the weekends, and home time with mom & dad is down time...a time to chill & flap & watch tv & jump on his ball...and mom & dad will be there to feed him, tickle him, love him up, wipe his butt (another life skill we need to work on), and prevent him from climbing on the staircase above the sofa...
This post is all over the place. But I guess I'm gonna end it here.
If you're gonna shop Amazon anyway, can I ask that you enter Amazon by using the search box above? This way I can make a little money. This blogging thing has been awesome & life changing for me... but I must admit that it's taking up a lot more time than I ever thought... so if I can make a few bucks it'll make it easier for me to justify....Love you all! Thanks!!